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A Hundred Thousand White Stones: An Ordinary Tibetan's Extraordinary Journey, by Kunsang Dolma, Evan Denno
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A Hundred Thousand White Stones is one young Tibetan woman's fearlessly told story of longing and change. Kunsang Dolma writes with unvarnished candor of the hardships she experienced as a girl in Tibet, violations as a refugee nun in India, and struggles as an immigrant and new mother in America. Yet even in tribulation, she finds levity and never descends to self-pity. We watch in wonder as her unlikely choices and remarkable persistence bring her into ever-widening circles, finding love and a family in the process, and finally bringing her back to her childhood home. A Hundred Thousand White Stones offers an honest assessment of what is gained in pursuing life in the developed world and what is lost.
- Sales Rank: #1193290 in eBooks
- Published on: 2013-05-20
- Released on: 2013-05-20
- Format: Kindle eBook
Review
"Especially now, when Tibetans are sacrificing their lives for their collective story to be heard, it is important that Kunsang Dolma so honestly shares her personal story. This ordinary Tibetan's extraordinary journey opens our hearts wider with each step in her shoes." (Kathleen Willis Morton, author of The Blue Poppy and The Mustard Seed)
"Refreshingly honest and brave, this book leaves us looking at our lives with completely new eyes." (Jaimal Yogis, author of Saltwater Buddha)
"Intimate, unpretentious, and insightful, this is a thoroughly contemporary story, told with clarity, about Tibetan pasts, presents, and futures." (Sienna Craig, author of Horses Like Lightning)
"Kunsang Dolma's journey is indeed extraordinary, born with grace and without rancor some of the most heartbreaking circumstances imaginable." (Tricycle)
About the Author
Born in 1980, Kunsang Dolma grew up in a remote village in the Tibetan borderlands. After becoming a nun, she escaped Tibet first to Nepal and then India. After giving up her nun's robes, she moved to the United States, where she now lives with her American husband and two daughters.
Excerpt. © Reprinted by permission. All rights reserved.
Introduction
Like most of Tibet’s refugees, I am neither a politician nor a saint; I am much like people from anywhere else in the world except for the experiences I’ve been through. I want to share my story because I don’t know of any ordinary Tibetans like me who have spoken up about what we’ve seen and what’s in our hearts. The process of going back through my history to write this book has not been easy. Some parts have been painful for me to revisit; many of the events in this book are ones I wish I could simply forget. For most of my life, I was ashamed of some of these experiences and told no one about them, not even my family or closest friends.
I was born in 1980 in a quiet village in the Amdo region of Tibet, where I lived until becoming a Buddhist nun as a teenager, a decision that led me to make the long and dangerous journey over the Himalayan Mountains into India to see the Dalai Lama. Although I gave up my nun’s robes there under unfavorable circumstances, I did meet a good man, now my husband, leading to a family and new life in America.
The life I grew up with in Tibet was very simple. When I say“simple,” I mean that we had what many people would consider a low standard of living, a life of poverty. I was born in a place without electricity or plumbing, with no cars, no telephones, and no television. Transportation was on foot or horseback. People knew almost nothing about the world outside of their own village and a few villages beyond it.
Even today, little has changed. Electricity was introduced to my village when I was around eleven or twelve years old. (Clocks and calendars were not widely used, so I’ll have to guess my age and the dates of most of the events of my childhood.) When I was able to go back to Tibet in 2010, the use of electricity remained very limited, and there was still no plumbing. I saw that my family members do have clocks and calendars now. I’m not sure how much use they get though; the calendars have yellowed with age over the years since they were put up, and the clocks are motionless, each house stuck at a different time.
As a child, I didn’t think our way of life in Tibet was any good at all. We worked hard with little to show for it, and our problems were deep, serious problems. Compared to the difficulties of daily life in Tibet, when Americans complain about a rough day, I can’t help but think, “You’ve got to be kidding me!”
As I get older, I’ve come to see things a little differently than I did as a child. Leaving Tibet was not the end of my struggles in life; the struggles only changed. Although I know firsthand that Tibet is not a utopia and never was, people in my village were mostly pretty happy despite our circumstances. My favorite part of the traditional way of life was the close connection between family and friends. No matter what happened or how much we argued, we felt close. We lived and worked together, sharing our fortunes. Looking back on all my experiences, it seems like that feeling of personal connection with others is the real key to happiness. I wish now that I could have back the life I left behind.
Most helpful customer reviews
6 of 6 people found the following review helpful.
A testament to the resilience of the human spirit
By Dreas
In reading Kunsang Dolma's memoir, I had to keep reminding myself that her story wasn't fiction. I knew little about the Tibetan culture before I read her book. I was consistently amazed by her bravery and determination to become a Buddhist nun and literally risk her life to escape to India to be with the Dalai Lama. The same determination was evidenced in her and her American husband, Evan's, tenacity to overcome the corrupt Indian bureaucracy so that they could legally marry. What a love story!
Kunsang Dolma's observations about American culture and values were eye opening. I assumed that life in America would be like a fairy tale come true for her after living a life of such material deprivation and lack of personal freedom. Instead of reveling in the material comforts life in America provides, Kunsang Dolma experienced the social isolation, loneliness and lack of sincere and meaningful connection endemic in our culture.
Her story also illuminates the power and importance of familial love. I cheered for her being reunited with her family in Tibet after not seeing them for almost 15 years and standing up to the ruthless Chinese police.
Kunsang Dolma is one fierce, determined woman. I hope she writes a sequel as I want to know what she does with her life.
5 of 5 people found the following review helpful.
...an incredible story of a Tibetan exile's search for the Dalai Lama, and finding freedom and love.
By Pen Name
Kunsang Dolma, from the traditional farming plateaus of Tibet, leaves everything behind in search of the Dalai Lama. Her life-threatening secret journey by foot across Tibet, the Himalayas and Nepal take her to India where she realizes her life-long dream of meeting the Dalai Lama. In exile, Dolma meets an American whom she marries after endless tests of character. They settle in America and bring two happy children into the world only to discover a longing so strong that Dolma seems willing to risk everything to see her family in Tibet once again. Dolma's story is smart, funny and courageous. The story begs the question "what happens next?" Will Dolma and her husband Evan find peace in America or secure safe passage back to Dolma's now-aged family? Soul-searching questions of citizenship, Visas, freedom and love are not taken for granted. Let's hope another book follows.
4 of 4 people found the following review helpful.
Heartfelt and heart full
By DHD
Kunsang Dolma's story is in some ways The American Immigrant Story, and in some ways it is very specific to her. It is always fascinating, honest, and told from the heart. Sometimes events are heartbreaking, but her fortitude carries her through. This is more than a book about overcoming obstacles, or being a Tibetan refugee. It makes the reader think about his or her own life, fate and choices made. There is a lot of material for discussion here as well as for reflection.
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